Given that it's Stress Awareness Month (according to whatever mysterious entity is responsible for deciding such things) I figured it might be helpful to explore how the wisdom of an ancient philosophy is applicable to the challenges of modern project management.
While I've been a fan of Stoic philosophy for many years, I failed to actively employ it in my daily life until relatively recently. This is somewhat unfortunate, because in hindsight, Stoicism could have been a tremendously helpful tool during some of the most tumultuous times in my career. But now that I’ve been practicing for a while, I’ve come to realize just how useful Stoicism can be, and I’d like to share some (hopefully) helpful insights.
First, we need to quickly clear up a common misconception. The word “stoic” is often used erroneously to describe an emotionless, uncaring person or attitude. This is not what the philosophy of Stoicism teaches us. We are not machines. We cannot ignore emotion outright. Rather, Stoicism gives us the tools to endure, avoid, and reframe negative emotions, and the detrimental effects they can have on our daily lives.
It’s difficult to not get carried away here, as there is so much Stoicism can teach us. Indeed, many books (some of which I’ve listed at the end of this piece) have been written on the resilient wisdom the ancient Stoics left behind. I could talk about this for hours, sharing many different anecdotes and quotes. Instead, I’d like to highlight two key tenets of Stoicism: Understanding what you can/cannot control, and maintaining a calm mind.
In perhaps its simplest form, this idea has been distilled down into something called The Serenity Prayer: "Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
Now, I realize that saying may be a bit too Live-Laugh-Love-y for some of you to digest without rolling your eyes. Indeed, I felt the same way when I first heard it. But the more I pondered those words, the more I started to understand the underlying truth they reveal.
A couple months ago I was at dinner with a few friends, one of whom had just started a new job in a notoriously cutthroat sector of the entertainment industry. He spoke glowingly of his new boss; about how level headed, prepared, calm, and rational he was. I remember him clearly stating: “Nothing rattles this guy.” The tone with which he said those four words conveyed just how rare and admirable these qualities have become.
This conversation reminded me of a simple fact: We respect managers who remain calm, even in the most difficult situations. When a leader panics, it gives everyone else license to do the same. And in a time when everything seems to move at lightspeed, it’s all too easy to descend into a top-down, spiraling freak out.
Then that got me thinking: How would Marcus Aurelius - Emperor of Rome and one of the great Stoic minds - approach project management in the digital age? That might seem like a silly question to some. But given how applicable the Stoic’s writings tend to be in our modern times, I couldn’t help but wonder.
In the end, this is all speculation (and maybe a bit of fan fiction). But I think he would have emphasized the importance of these same principles. At a time when everything feels so fast, frantic, and distracting, it’s the role of leaders to guide us toward the things that really matter. In that pursuit, I think he would have reiterated how critical it is to keep a clear, calm mind, and approach complex problems by breaking them down into digestible pieces. That is, focus on what we can actually control, and don’t get distracted by all the other noise.
Some of my colleagues may be reading this and thinking "I've seen Josh stressed, upset, or frustrated by situations at work before - what is he talking about?" And they'd be correct. But that's the beautiful thing about Stoicism - it's a practice. The goal is not to be an emotionless robot, never showing any signs of weakness. It's about trying to maintain a calm mind capable of navigating the difficulties of life. Every mistake is seen as an opportunity for learning. Every setback is a chance to rise to the challenge of adversity. Few things cloud judgment quite like anger, nervousness, and fear. So much of our frustrations at work (and in life) stem from events and people we never had control over in the first place.
I do not claim to have mastered these teachings, preaching the words of the ancients as if they are an instant solution to all your workplace woes. All I know is that Stoic practice has had a positive impact on me, especially recently. So perhaps it may provide some benefit to you as well.
Whenever I’m confronted with the thoughts of various potential negative outcomes, I try to remember one of my favorite aphorisms: "Worrying is like paying a debt you don't owe."
Once again, this does not mean we shouldn’t care about bad things happening. There's something deeply rooted in human beings that allows us to ponder what may occur in the future. Indeed, it’s one of the more unique and useful traits that we possess. But that ability has both pros and cons. So the next time you’re kept up at night worrying about what someone might say, do, or think, remember these words from the great Stoic, Seneca: "We suffer more in imagination than in reality.”
I recently encountered a situation while managing a project that gave me an opportunity for some Stoic practice. It was the night before a shoot we had scheduled across the country. One of our key crew members called me and said he was feeling sick, and didn’t think he could make it to work the following morning. Simply put, we were going to need to cancel or reschedule the whole affair.
At this point, I had a few different options to choose from. It was almost 9:00pm for me in Los Angeles, and basically everyone involved, including the client, was on the East coast.
I could have:
Instead, I chose to:
In the end, thankfully we were able to come up with a viable alternative solution. Everyone involved in the project was relieved that we made it work, but more importantly, that we did so without causing undue stress and anxiety.
I recognize that some people may read this and say: “Well that’s a nice story, but this strategy wouldn’t have been realistic or applicable to the time when I had to deal with xyz terrible thing that happened. Luckily you were in a situation where it wasn’t that bad.”
Indeed, in the grand scheme of things, this was not the end of the world. But that’s the point - if it’s not the end of the world, then don’t make it so. We always have the option to make things worse for ourselves and others. The challenging (and more rewarding) choice is to not let the negative event ruin your state of mind, and by extension, your life.
As the brilliant author Douglas Adams famously wrote in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (my favorite book), step one is simply this: "Don't Panic."
Here are some practical tips and book recommendations:
Things you can actually do to have a healthier (and more Stoic) approach to the stresses of modern life:
Key questions to ask yourself in any situation:
Some great books that I personally have found helpful:
- The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday